Never Grow Up

You're little hands wrapped around my finger
And, it's so quiet in the world tonight
You're little eyelids flutter cause you're dreaming 
So, I took you in
Turn on your favorite night light
To you, everything's funny
You got nothing to regret
I'd give all I had, honey
If you could stay like that 

Oh, darling don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up 
Just stay this little 
Oh, darling don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up 
It can stay this simple

I won't let nobody hurt you, won't let no one break your heart
And no one will desert you 
Just try to never grow up, and never grow up 

You're in the car on the way to the movies
And, you're mortified
You're mom's dropping you off
At, fourteen there's just so much you can't do 
And you can't wait to move out someday and call your own shots
But, don't make her drop you off around the block 
Remember that she's getting older too 
And don't lose the way that you dance around in your PJ's getting ready for school

Oh, darling don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up 
Just stay this little 
Oh, darling don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up 
It can stay this simple

And no one's ever burned you 
Nothing's ever left you scarred
And even though you want to 
Just try to never grow up 

Take pictures in your mind of your childhood room
Memorize what it sounded like when your dad get's home
Remember the footsteps, remember the words said 
And all you're little brothers favorite songs 
I just realized everything I had is someday gonna be gone 

So, here I am in my new apartment 
In a big city, they just dropped me off
It's so much colder than I thought it would be 
So, I tucked myself in and turned my night light on 
Wish I'd never grown up
I wish I'd never grown up 

Oh, I don't wanna grow up 
Wish I'd never grown up 
Could still be little 
Oh, I don't wanna grow up 
Wish I'd never grown up 
It could still be simple 

Oh, darling don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up 
Just stay this little 
Oh, darling don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up 
It can stay this simple

I won't let nobody hurt you
Won't let no one break your heart
And even you want to 
Please, try to never grow up 

Oh, whoa 
Don't you ever grow up 
Oh, whoa 
Never grow up 
Just never grow up

TEAM EDWARD!!!

I love The Twilight Saga. Too much. Kristen Stewart is gorgeous. She doesn't act like she knows she's famous. She doesn't care what anyone thinks and she's an awesome actress. Robert Pattinson is Beautiful. But unlike a lot of people, Thats not the only reason i love him. He seems so smart and normal and FUNNY. Watching his interviews crack me up. Kellan Lutz is pretty amazing too. Ashley Greene is gorgeous as well and seems so confident. It's refreshing to see new actors who really love what they do and are thankful for what they have. I Love Twilight, I love the cast, and i cannot wait until Breaking Dawn. :)


Taylor's okay I guess...

TEAM EDWARD!!!!!!

we fell through- current project

Everytime you come around
I feel like something drowns me out
and i feel like speedin up
you know the way i used to love you
you know that something about you
makes me wanna go out...


and/to find someone new
i dont need you to tell me
what to do and how to do it
i fell through
rather sooner than later
you fell through too


they see the difference between you and me
they know nothing else can calm us down
then to see the other one more time
because we both share a mutual goal...

refrain


Bridge
why did it crack?
the times we had
were a waste
because you dont understand
that i need to


refrain 

Unfinished songs drive me crazy. So i'll just post them. For the one person who reads this...here's your entertainment for the day.

Two halves of a whole i thought we'd be
but ignorant unawareness is all i see
my half is there, its presently alive
but your half is idol, its barely a prize.


Why cant you see, what you've done to me?
I wish you could see how you make my heart fly
for you i would die, for you i have cried
but you don't even know
no, you don't even know


Every time i walk by, i get butterflies
but from you all i get is a barely lipped hi
I could walk around naked but you would stay..
stay where you are but then walk away


I wouldn't be surprised if everybody could see
that it was more than a crush on my end...


?????????? 

I have issues

I have a problem. I wanna know what my hair would look like this color.

Believe in Me

I think this song portrays almost every teenage girl. including me. We are constantly competing for approval. But the only approval we need is our own.

Edgar Allan Poe: Crazy or Alone?

Edgar Allan Poe is an amazing poet and short story author. Although most people consider him mentally deranged or crazy, I don't think he was. Sure his life was hard and he was alone for most of it. His Father neglected him and ignored him as well as not giving him any help. He refused to help Poe when he needed it and Poe was not included in his fathers will. Poe's mother died when he was young also. Soon after writing The Tell Tale Heart, Poe's wife died of tuberculosis. He was a heavy drinker and was very poor. These things could easily make someone crazy. But I don't think Poe was the crazy one. I think the characters he created were the crazy ones. Poe was lonely. His works describe things with words we associate with loneliness and depravity. Some of his characters were without a doubt "crazy" and others were just lonely like their creator. The man in The Raven I believe is not crazy. I think he is a depiction of Poe himself. Poe lost a few beautiful women in his life and so he often wrote about loosing beautiful women. The Raven is an example of that. He is talking to himself and hearing things and hopes it will be Lenore knocking at his door when he knows she is dead. When anybody looses someone, they don't want to believe it is true. They act as if the person is still here. As if the person will somehow hear them and come back. He's not crazy, he's just mourning. But in The Tell Tale Heart on the other hand, I believe that character is indeed crazy. he goes to such extreme measures so he simply won't have to look at a persons eye anymore. That in itself is odd. He plans everything out ahead of time and will take hours if necessary to make sure he is not heard. Then He kills the guy. All so he won't have to look at his ugly eye. Crazy. Then he hides him under the floor board and acts completely calm as he talks to the police. Eventually he gets so paranoid that guilt takes over him and he begins to supposedly hear the man alive under the floor board. Crazy. He wastes a week of his life on the extermination of this man and in the end, he is so guilty that he confesses. Poe is not crazy for coming up with the story. It's supposed to unrealistic like all of his works. But the Character in my opinion has a mental issue. he is defiantly CRAZY. What do you think?

all better

I love getting things out. Once i write about it whether its a blog or a song/poem, i feel so much better and i can forget about the problem. I am a fairly passive person so it's easy for me to let people put me down. It's not that i don't take it to heart, i just don't express the fact that i was effected by it. I also hate to tell people how i feel because being disliked by someone is a huge fear of mine. If someone doesn't like me, i try my hardest to get them to like me. Thats just who I am. When i get things out of my system i can move on. So this is me moving on...

Brains aren't everything

For the last year or so I have felt lower than dirt daily. Almost every single person i know makes me feel stupid and like a lap dog. I feel like this every day of my life. They may not think they do it, but they do. And some of them, one in particular, does it to prove they are confident and smart and a good leader when i can see right through them. They are just as insecure as the rest of us. They do anything to make themselves feel good about themselves.

Thank you...

Dear Dad,
Thank you for letting me know how stupid i am and how much of a failure i am and will be. I really needed to be reminded for the 563,998,983,000th time that i have a D in one class. I am aware. and How about instead of telling me i'm dumb, you volunteer to help me study and ask me what i think the issue is so i can fix it. But i guess your way works too. Thank you.


Love, your failure of a daughter


Em

NOW WHAT?

The idea of being a senior is supposed to awesome right? well, frankly i'm a little disappointed. There is so much that needs to be done. The play my friend and I are producing eats up so much time and there are applications to do, essays to write, normal homework to do...Its so stressful. The idea of my entire class splitting up after 13 years to go our separate ways is a little scary to me. College doesn't scare me as much as the question that will follow. NOW WHAT? I hate that question and i'm afraid of that question. Everyone is so excited to move away, and start over. Not me. I'm afraid of what comes next...